Sam and Lucy seem like the perfect couple. Successful, happy and in love. But life isn't that simple.

Lucy thinks Sam is a sad, cold, sensitivity-exclusion zone would rather read a newspaper than have an emotion. Sam thinks Lucy is blaming him because she can't walk  past Mothercare without getting all teary. The problem is that they might be infertile. And in more ways than one.

Lucy wants a baby. Sam wants to write a hit movie. And given the average IVF cycle has about a one in five chance of going into full production, Lucy's chances of getting what she wants are considerably better than Sam's.

What Sam and Lucy are about to go through is absolutely inconceivable. The question is, can their love survive? Sometimes it's possible to want something too much. That's when you risk losing what you have.

 

 
I've been a fan of Benjy's since he and his revolting old sparkly suit appeared on Saturday Night Live alongside Stavros and Loadsamoney (dosh, dosh dosh!). Over the years I've seen him go from an edgy, astute satirical stand up through being a media lovey, and now finally a slightly aging middle aged farty trying to cling to his old anarchic image. I think maybe teaming up with Andrew Lloyd Webber was the final nail in that coffin. However as he's deteriorated as a stand up he's progressed as a writer, and over the last few years he's turned out some interesting and well observed comic novels that I have really enjoyed. This is one of the few books he's written that I've not read, and so when a Book Crosser offered it up I jumped at the chance to read it. I've heard Benji talk about this book in interviews, that it's based on the true story about the conception of his twins, and so I'm curious to see whether he'll tell the tale in a different style. I also have the movie made from this book on tape waiting for the time when I have got my act together enough to read it, so with any luck it'll be in my read pile before too long.

 

 
March 13th 2004
The End

I've spent the last three days caught up in Sam and Lucy's journey to conceive a child. On the whole I really enjoyed the book, though I did have a couple of problems with the way it was written.

First off, the 'He Said, She Said' style of presentation was really interesting. Seeing the same events from hormonal opposites certainly gave context and perspective to the events in the book. I didn't find Lucy that well rounded as a character though, and for all Ben's right-on liberated machinations he really doesn't seem that in touch with women's thoughts.

The story is a simple, and heartbreaking, tale of a loving couple being driven apart by their failure to have children, and the extremes they are willing to go to in order to have a baby. The desperation of their plight is beautifully written, and it's impossible not to be metaphorically crossing your fingers for Sam and Lucy throughout. They are put through every possible humiliation in their quest, from Sam having to wank into a cup in various situations to Lucy's post-coital pelvic examination. All seemingly designed to inform and torture in equal measure, and in no real way baring fruit. I found the story absorbing, but also very informative about the various treatments/tests couples endure. Clearly, there were also enough knob gags (not in a blow job sense) to make the story highly entertaining.

It wasn't without it's faults though. An awful lot of the journal writing was repetitive, and I found it uncomfortable that there was so very much seething resentment bubbling under the surface of the relationship. At the same time as declaring their love for each other they were tearing each other to shreds in their books. When they both began their various betrayals I'd almost come to the point of hoping they didn't manage to bring a child into their fucked-up dysfunction, as neither one was adult enough to raise a child. I think my main point is that I didn't like the principle characters one bit. Sam was a self-centred, weak and reserved little arse whose self-esteem was located solely in his pants. When he couldn't produce the goods to make him feel like a man he instead sold his soul (and Lucy's) for a few cheap laughs and to give his ego a boost of a different kind. At the same time Lucy was a selfish little whiner with as much empathy as a slab of concrete, and too thin-skinned to exist in an oxygen bubble let alone in the real world. Not one of the bit players was interesting either, instead Ben indulged his usual sense of parody and made up oh-so-funny names that in no way reflected the real people they were based on at all, no siree!

Then we come to my most repetitious complaint about Ben Elton's novels. Yet again he regurgitated endless skits from his stand-up shows! I think the entire 'Man from Auntie' ep about sex and contraception was recycled at one point or another! Not that it's not funny, but for God's sake, it's nearly 20 years old now! Write a new knob gag!! It would be better if he didn't use almost the same phraseology and language for delivery, but instead he repeats himself verbatim, which instead of invoking laughter causes me to roll my eyes as I recognise this most lazy trick used over and over again!

All in all, however, I did really enjoy reading this book. I do like Ben's writing style, and though Lucy was rather two dimensional and shallow, I did like seeing the two sides of the story inter-cut with each other. If nothing else it gives insight into the true frustration and depression of infertility, though I didn't find much of the comedy fresh or funny. I'm quite looking forward to watching the movie 'Maybe Baby' now, to see how different the two are.